Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Recipe of the Week: The Grilled Cheezza

Behold, the most audicious entry in the pallate parade since the McRib...

THE GRILLED CHEEZZA

This culinary "instant classic" came to life in February 2007 while I was living in Los Angeles. Today marks the 21 month anniversary of that fateful night. And to celebrate this clearly made up milestone I'm going to release the recipe for the first time! No, no, don't try to stop me. Genius must be shared.


Directions:

Step 1 - Never go grocery shopping. Ever.

Step 2 - Think of the idea for Grilled Cheezza and make a special trip to the grocery store. Purchase 1 frozen Digiorno's Pepperoni Pizza, 1 loaf wheat bread (obvious health benefits), and a block of cheddar cheese. DO NOT buy anything else (see Step 1).

Step 3 - Make that Digiorno's joke in the check out line. People respect other people who can repeat commercials in a natural setting.

Step 4 - Put fresh ingredients inside your sweet Ford Focus hatchback. Manually unlock the door, but make that unlock door beeping sound as you do it. Drive the 6 blocks back to your house. Because that's what you do in LA., you drive. Anything further than 30ft.

Step 4 - Put frozen pizza into the oven. Position 4 inches left of center. Positioning contingent on where "weird stuff" is stuck on oven rack.

Step 4 - Make a grilled cheese sandwich.

Step 5 - Wonder aloud why you're still single.

Step 6 - Remove now fully cooked pizza. Make Digiorno joke again although no one is around. Laugh smugly. This type of behavior will ensure your survival on a deserted island.

Step 7* - Cut two grilled cheese size pieces of pizza. Put grilled cheese in the middle of said pieces.

Step 8 - Eat half of Grilled Cheezza. Cry.

Step 9 - Finish it.

Step 10 - Realize that pizza already has cheese and bread in abundance and makes no sense to add more. Realize that previous realization is just fear. We always fear what we don't understand.

Step 11 - Finish rest of pizza to show self that thought pizza didn't need more cheese and bread who the boss is. Cry.

Step 12 - Play XBox.


*double recipe as needed

4 comments:

The House that James Built said...

me ahead of you on anything technological?? can't be... glad you joined the blogging world- marcella is beautiful. glad we'll be able to stay in touch better. xoxo

The House that James Built said...

oh yeah... i'm definitley making this for dinner tonight and maybe every night! james will think it's better than me not making anything at all...i hope.

Sheena Cody and Taylor said...

looks like a heart attack ready to happen ;)
Hope you dont mind if I add you to my blog, feel free to do the same.

Cameron said...

Yes! Make the Cheeza, he'll love it.

Hi Sheena!

Yep, adding your blog now :)

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